Q&A: How to Remove the Third Party?
In my Q&A series, I answer questions from readers of the GrimoireGirl blog to help guide them in their journeys as conscious creators. I recently got an email via my Q&A Submission page from Swapnadip, who is dealing with trouble around a third party.
Swapnadip writes:
I’m in the way of manifesting my SP but there’s a third party who is delaying the process of my manifestation.
My girlfriend likes me a lot but whenever that guy calls her, then she talks with him for hours. Whenever that guy wants to go on a trip with her, she always goes along with him.
I often visualize them quarreling with each other and having a breakup. Though this manifests sometimes, the breakup does not last long.
They again start talking to each other. Many times I also try to ignore the third party but it is not working right now for me.
I’m looking for a permanent removal of the third party within a specific timeline. Can you please guide me on the technique to follow for achieving my goal?
Dear Swapnadip,
I talk a lot on my blog about how SP manifestations are mechanically no different from the “small stuff.” But the reality of it is that a lot of us struggle with SP manifestations because of how easy it is to become attached to an outcome. There’s no shame in this; I’ve been there myself as well, and even seasoned manifestors struggle from time to time.
The thing about SP manifestations is that our attachment to the outcome causes a lot of us to build up a lot of resistance. When we love someone, or want to fix a relationship with a friend, or want to gain the attention of a person, it’s so easy to feel a need (lack) rather than a want or preference.
From reading your message, what I sense about you is that a lot of your focus is on this third party, when it should be on yourself. You’re clearly very frustrated about the presence of this third party, and you read as if you feel threatened by his presence. It seems that you feel that he has the power to take your person away from you. And your visualizations of your person and the third party fighting and breaking up is really only putting more emphasis internally on your true state/vibration: feeling threatened by the third party.
The reason I mention that your focus should be on yourself is this: we manifest not what we want, but who we are. The person you are manifesting yourself to be is someone who feels threatened, and therefore receives 3D threats. And the more focus you put on this third party, the more threatening it will become, regardless of whether your visualizations manifest or not.
According to the law of assumption, the reason that you are seeing these breakups between your specific person and the third party manifest and then fall back is that you are manifesting the breakup, but not changing your inner state.
Your inner state needs to become one of confidence, security, and assurance. Otherwise, you may see hot and cold behavior from your specific person, more frustration with the third party, or new obstacles to your relationship.
And this is less about your specific person as it is about yourself. If your vibration is saying, “I do not feel that my relationship with my specific person is secure,” then you will have that reflected to you in your 3D. This might come in the form of more issues with the third party, or in other ways. But unless your concept of self changes, the frustrations will continue.
My advice to you is to take some time to address your self-concept as is relates to your love life. I actually have another post that might help you about one of my own SP success stories that relates to self concept, which you can find here: How My SP Went From Distant to Madly in Love.
Addressing your self concept in this area will do you more good than any specific manifestation right now. As you’ve been seeing, you get a little of what you want, and then it goes back to “normal,” based on your state. This is because in your heart of hearts, you feel that your SP can be taken from you, and perhaps even fear it.
Let this be okay as you work on it. Don’t beat yourself up for these very human feelings. Naturally, negative thoughts will arise. Allow them, forgive them, flip them, and they will go away more and more with time. I have a post that may help in this area as well, called Breaking the Fear of Believing.
At the end of the day, just do the work around your negative thoughts, and they will diminish. Find some affirmations that put you on the pedestal. Always try to view yourself as wanted, desired, prioritized, and as someone who naturally gets what they want.
You will find that as you step into this role mentally more and more, it will also be reflected in your physical world. Walk in faith as you build this new identity, and you’ll see that it will inevitably come from your specific person as well.
Learn to focus on yourself. Take back all the emotional and mental power you’ve given away to the third party, and invest it in a new you who is confident, prioritized, and committed to.
Remind yourself that you are secure, and no one is better than you! This is not in a self-centered way, but in a calm, confident, and never-threatened kind of way. Never again will the third party bother you, because you know you are the best, and so does your person.
This is a process, but if you are committed to your growth and to getting the kind of love life you want, it is well worth the effort.
Looking for Manifesting Help?
If you are looking for free law of attraction coaching, feel free to reach out to me through my contact form available on my Q&A Submission page for a chance to have your question answered here on the Grimoire Girl blog!
